The Art of Being Human.

It's been over fourteen years since I packed up two suitcases, one with shoes and one with clothes, took my $400 dollars which I saved up by working at the Black Eyed Pea and Lerner at Sunland Park Mall in El Paso and took a one way flight to Los Angeles. I was nineteen then and there was no way I could have known what awaited me. It took ten years of living the life Hollywood wanted for me to realize what I wanted for myself, to come into my own being and be comfortable with who I was and what I wanted out of life. Realizing most of all how I wanted to contribute to the planet. I wouldn't change one single thing about my life and it has been quite the journey!

I was telling my bestfriend Mary this week that if I was to live up to the statistics this society places on me I'd be a fatherless Latina from a single parent home with no college education consumed by the labels unable to move forward. Lucky for me I was born to a warrior who raised seven kids alone and since I believe you are what you know I became a warrior. However it took ten years of doing things a certain way and not being content with the outcome to summon that inner warrior. In those ten years I went to therapy for four years straight and cried. Stopped caring if I ever acted again. Fell in love with all the men I longed to have fill the shoes of my absent father and like in any pattern repeating itself they would eventually leave. I went to Amoeba Music a lot, dated two guys there, learned a lot about music and eventually realized if it weren't for going to Amoeba that often I would not have the vast knowledge I do of music now or the love I have for all music. Most of all I would have never heard this song and found the courage to summon my inner warrior. Which confirms my belief that everything, even what seems like mundane, happens for a reason and is leading you somewhere.


This became my theme for 2006. No matter what happened I knew that the most important thing I had to do was FACE THE FEAR AND DO IT ANYWAY! Worst that could happen was I could fail, and I have, but I would grow. I had to do what ancient proverb I once stumbled upon encouraged me to "Be not afraid of growing slowly, be afraid only of standing still". The truth is in failing I learned how essential that failure was for me to become who I have and be where I am.

People often tell me "you're on your way" or "I can feel it you'll be famous soon". Most of the time I just smile because what exactly am I suppose to say to that? Maybe I should try the honest route and say to them what I said to Mary. I don't care to be famous, I've accomplished more than I ever dreamt I would in a completely different way than I ever dreamt I would and because of that there is so much happiness within me and gratitude, which I am not silent about, because it comes with doing what you love. What you TRULY love not what we are sold to love or be. I'd rather strike a pose on a red carpet somewhere because of an accomplishment that came from a very dark hour then because I am selling someone's perfume and telling people how to buy their art of being. No thank you! That said to each their own. ;-)You can read about the gift that came from one of the many dark hours on my journey here. Me and Paulo Coelho how the universe conspired to cross our paths.
Same blog Jason Mraz reposted on his blog and actually how we met. ;-)

I support people following their DREAM. Yes sometimes you end up sacrificing a lot but time and time again I have seen that the sacrifices of following your own path are exceeded by what awaits you at the end of the journey. All things do come to an end and the only thing constant is change. Which brings me to today and where my journey has led me. I have to say that if I wrote everyone who has affected my journey by encouraging me or for that matter discouraging me we'd be here forever. For now I have to point out that thanks to Vince Shultz, Paul Rodriguez, Susan Taylor, Randy Kent, Danielle Artigo, Mary Queen Angel, John Rincon, Chris Beltran, Alex Jehs, Gaby Moreno, Jason Mraz's publishers, Paulo Coelho and Neil Lisk I am able to keep navigating the waters of uncharted territory that is my first feature length film. If I forgot you I am sorry. You know who you are and you know I am grateful.;-)

What my teachers who I am in constant contact with on a daily basis are teaching me now is the importance of being firm without being mean. In saying what I want and need without saying it meanly and remembering the words of Neil, "Adriana people are either going to do things as you can offer them it be done within your company's means or not. Whoever can't do it as your production can is not the right person to be there but you need to put your foot down". ;-) After all when you are the CEO of a company it means giving deadlines no matter how small your company is. I never want to hurt anyone and therefore in that lies my struggle. However everyday brings with it the opportunity for growth. I am learning and getting better at saying what I mean and meaning what I say without saying it meanly. ;-)

Which brings me to this week and the realization that ah...yes I too am human! Shocking I know. This week I did things that were out of character by taking out my frustration for other situations on innocent by standards and for that I am truly sorry. The lesson in that was knowing that I am not perfect, thank God. I have a lot on my plate right now and I also have a lot of letting go to do as well. If I've learned anything it's that the only thing I control is the footwork towards producing an outcome. The outcome however so not in my hands. So for today I forgive myself and my out of character behavior and I hope those whose character I attacked have forgiven me too. I am after all only human but with that thought in mind I also have to remind myself the golden rule I try everyday to live by, "do unto others as you would have them do unto you". I am aware that everything we do has a chain reaction so be gentle with your words and actions. Forgive yourself when the art of being human introduces you to a side of you you'd rather not indulge in. ;-)


For now I will carry on with the only baggage I truly need, a suitcase full of faith. No matter what life keeps throwing my way I know one thing is certain "faith sees the invisible, believes the incredible and creates the impossible". Changed the quote a little to fit what I've lived as I believe we CREATE our destiny. ;-) I'll continue taking leaps of faith and trusting that my net will appear and no matter what happens one thing is for sure, I'll be taking the Long Way Around and wherever I arrive I hope you are there with me but I trust that all is and will be as it should be.

"It can get pretty lonely when you show yourself. Guess I could of made it easier on myself but I could never follow"