Monday, September 12, 2011

It's a beautiful day! A miracle is born of faith and gratitude.

I have spent the last few days since a decision was reached last Wednesday to save our current project after we were given news that we weren't expecting, working non-stop. When I was told how not doing something is going to cost me well a fire was lit under my tush, whether it was done in a polite way or not at this point is besides the point. What it did was ignite the fire to save two years worth of hard work. There is no way I can hand over all we've done to develop something and walk away and we just call in the day. I am not who I am today or where I am because I walked away in defeat when things were detoured or fear descended. I am where I am because when things got detoured and I had to find a way, I did just that. I found a way.

It would be beyond foolish for me to say the ways now and in the past where found solely because of my hard work. This current production has had two casts and a few rounds of production people with one person always by my side for over a year now. Its Director, Randy. We have lived through so much together. Right now would be a great time to thank his amazingly patient wife! It's a good thing I am single or I may be by now with all I have had to pour into this production. Who could put up with this amount of passion for Latinos in film, for going beyond what meets the eye, for presenting a story like no other that could actually leave people with a more open heart and less judgement? Well hopefully someone but for now all is as it should be in that department. Each of us in separate worlds honoring our own art till the planets align and the universe conspires. Timing is everything! ;-)

Randy's wife is not the only one I came here to acknowledge this beautiful morning. It is a list of endless angels who upon getting my emails started flying in left and right wanting nothing in return but to help see this dream come to life. You want to know who your real friends are and you want to see people put their words into action produce something with no money. I thought my other budgets were tight? HA! I actually have one weekend to produce this with know idea how I will feed everyone but with absolute faith that the fish will be multiplied. Due to that faith things are unfolding beautifully and so today I came to share with you the dreamer my miracle being born of faith in hopes that you can find it in you to follow your heart to follow that voice that while it may be more quiet than others at times is always still there reassuring of the good that awaits you which the other voices try hard to silence. That is the one I follow and because I do after four days of working straight I have about seventy-five percent of my work done! All FAVORS with NO ONE making a dime. And the say MIRACLES don't exist! ;-)

I am not here to condemn those who preach all about helping eachother and when push comes to shove are nowhere to be found but I am here to HONOR all those who are able to move beyond fear and put their words into actions. This list is partial and I am sure as the week goes by and we get ready to go to set Saturday it will have grown. The gratitude I have for these people can not be expressed in words but you should know that what you will see by the end of the month that is an effort to save our project is because of these people. Mercedes Ferguson-Cortazar, Sarah and Grant Smith, Beverly Bishop, Areli Paredes, Josefa Salinas, Kunal, Michael Huang, Leo, Eric Schwartz, Pamela Corey, Mary Queen Angel, Danielle Artigo, Blanca Valdez, Ruben Garfias, Eve Muller, Vince and Nicole Shultz, Lisa, Randy, Michael Mullen, Micheal Teh, Jessica Ranek and Alejandro and Ingrid at ad agency behind my UNICEF ad. None of which asked for this acknowledgement and some too humble to accept it. All these people and many others voluntarily CHOSE to step into the ring with me and keep up the fight till the day my fate is delivered. In a little less than two months. ;-) Till that day I will fight as best as I can without hurting anyone or anything but simply honoring my calling. I was born to be a warrior and I will honor it and all that comes with it and be grateful that prayers are always answered on God's time.

It is said that what you put out is what you get back. Here's a little proof. I could have never known in 2009 that I would need a house that was ranch style in 2011 to make a project come to life. What I did know in that moment was that I was willing to go off the grid and shoot a commercial for UNICEF because as they saw at the audition I have been a supporter for years. I flashed them my donor card. Some people flash other things at auditions I flash donor cards. ;-) I earn my work on merit or as some see it loose it because of merit. I prefer to see it as my gain and this was a gain I had no idea would come back this big. I did this spot because people aren't getting a basic human right, water. I did it because people not having clean water is simply not okay in my world, period. This morning Alejandro and Ingrid, Creative Director and CEO respectively of Ad agency behind spot, sent me an email informing me that they would provide such location and that it was what they could do to pay me back for what I had done for UNICEF. This was a payback I could have never for seen and quite frankly the spot winning eight International awards was more than enough. I had already been paid in other ways but today yet again I was paid in another ways. It is indeed true that what you put out comes back but what is best about that is when you don't expect it to come back and God and the universe surprise you in the most magical of ways when you need it most. Their emails brought tears to my eyes.

I must get back to work because oh yeah not only am I producing but I star in it. I hope to make you proud as we have no stereotypes and my character while Latina is not a housekeeper or temptress but a law student and above all a human being simply being trying to find her way through life as best as she can while life happens on life's terms. I will tell you this, while some may have seen my choice to stop and heal as lazy because I worked less I see it as life imitating art. What that time gave me to prepare for this character and the amount of loss both her and I have to deal with is no coincidence but part of the plan that was being weaved into the pattern of my life to prepare me for something that only life could have prepared me for. No acting class or coach could have given me the depth of emotions life did which I will need to call upon this weekend. Please send me light, love, prayers or whatever you believe in for a magical shoot and strength to make it through.

Today is a beautiful day so I leave you with this. I used it in my play when I walked onstage to do my monologue as my intro song. I share it with you because as you just read I have a lot to be grateful for! My list is soooo long and it includes you. Thank you for taking time out of your day to read this. I hope you can find the beauty in what are called the everyday mundane tasks and may your path be crossed with angels willing to help you see your dream become a reality. I believe in gratitude lies abundance for you are able to see more of life's blessings!

An excerpt from today's Daily OM Horoscope which I read upon completing blog. Timing!
"As you feel the soothing energy of your environment, you may want to extend a few words of thanks to the universe for taking care of you. Simply being in this space can add to your overall sense of well-being.

Appreciating our surroundings lets us remain aware of the wonders we have been given. Allowing ourselves to be enveloped by the warmth of our environment and loved ones increases our awareness of the beauty that is in our lives. When times are difficult, it can be easy to forget that we have been blessed with so much. Realizing that we have everything we need in the present moment, however, helps us cultivate our feelings of contentment since we see that there is nothing lacking in our lives. By recognizing all that the universe has offered you, you will feel greater peace, joy, and warmth in your life today."

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